Sunday, August 7, 2011

REAL TALK



Kids,
We need to have a talk.

When you travel to another city it's customary to go the local skater-owned skateshop and ask the locals where the spots are. This is a time-honored tradition; and, quite often, most shops will help you out.

It is not cool to go to the local skateshop and steal things from them. If Hell really does exist, there is probably a section of it devoted to the particularly heinous crime of stealing from skater-owned and operated skateshops. Possible punishments in this (hopefully) small portion of the Ninth Circle include attempting a trick for all eternity but never landing it (a la Sisyphus), having to watch The Storm (with Jerry's and Smolik/Turner's parts edited out) on an eternal loop, or perhaps being trapped inside this place during a sweltering St. Louis summer forever.

This past Saturday, our good friends at Escapist in KC phoned to let us know that some skaters from St. Louis stopped by and asked for directions to spots. After being given directions, one of them proceeded to steal stuff from Escapist. Pretty Skateboards roundly denounces this vile action. Our message to the perpetrator is simple: Fuck off and quit skateboarding, you ungrateful pile of shit. Right now.

BTW, if anyone can identify the person wearing the backwards hat in the above surveillance video, please let us know.

For the rest of you who know better: Please disregard this lecture, thank your parents for raising you so well, and enjoy the rest of your summer.
Sincerely,
Pretty